Yep. Marriage most definitely matters. We live in a culture now that says the exact opposite: that is doesn’t matter, isn’t valuable, isn’t worth it. The list could go on and on. However, I am here to say that it absolutely DOES matter. In the eyes of Jesus, marriage is sacred and completely holy. And, I will take it one step further and say that it is sanctifying as well. Christian marriage depicts beautifully the relationship that Jesus has with the church.
Jesus loves the church (that would be us, believers–not a building) fiercely. So much so, that he was willing to lay His own life down for us to save us because we couldn’t do it (and frankly, we wouldn’t). Through marriage, you get that same kind of picture. Marriage is so much more than our happiness. It is showing the world the love of Christ through it. You see, marriage matters because through it we depict Jesus’ love, and without it the world couldn’t physically see the love of Christ played out.
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Even though marriage depicts the love of Christ, that in no way means that it will be easy. We are sinful, flawed humans serving a holy, sinless and perfect God. Mess ups happen. Fights happen. And a whole host of other things happen because of us being human. The thing though that makes Christian marriage the most beautiful, is the willingness to make it work no matter what kinds of things happen.
Note: Before you start questioning my words, I do understand that sometimes divorce happens. I also know that it is not what God wants, but that sometimes it is necessary and God will allow it. But when you enter into a marriage covenant, you make a vow for life and this shouldn’t be an option unless God prompts you to make that call.
Marriage only works and lasts if your marriage and your life is centered around Christ. I know for a fact that there are things out there that will give you a step by step guide and tell you how to “make it work” apart from Christ, and that may work for a while, but the only way your marriage works is if it first belongs to Christ. He is the author and designer of it, He also knows each of us better than we know ourselves. We can’t change our hearts, but God sure can!
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You might be reading this today struggling in your own marriage and thinking there’s no hope for you and that you can’t fix your marriage. Friend, YOU yourself can’t fix your marriage. Put your marriage and your spouse in God’s hands and let HIM do the dirty work. Only God can change yours and your spouse’s heart. The best thing that you can do, is continue loving them and seeing them the way that Jesus does (regardless of their behavior), and ask God to change their heart.
John 15:5 says “I am the vine, you are the branches. The one who remains in me and I in him produces much fruit, because you can do nothing without me”.
I think this verse can apply to a lot of things in life, but I am specifically going to relate it to marriage. We can’t make marriage work apart from Christ. We can’t change our spouses apart from Christ. We absolutely cannot love our spouse the right way apart from Christ. We can’t have a God-honoring marriage apart from Christ. We have to take ourselves out of that equation and replace “we” with “He”. Because truly, He is before all things and in all things, and all things hold together by Him.
Colossians 1:17 says: “He is before all things, and by him all things hold together”.
You don’t have to believe a word that I say, but I encourage you to see (and hear) what God says about the matter and then let me know. I know that I am no professional, but I am speaking on what I am learning and what God is teaching me myself. I can also speak about what God is showing me through my own marriage. I hope that some portion of this helped someone in some way today.
Just remember: Christ loves you more deeply than your spouse does or will be able to, and He can satisfy you more than your spouse can. That doesn’t mean that marriage isn’t worth it. It absolutely is! But your marriage won’t fulfill you. Only Jesus can do that. Give Jesus your heart and your marriage, and watch Him make it great.