Dear Husband | An Open Letter

Dear-Husband

Dear Husband, 

I want to start off saying that I am sorry. I am sorry for the selfish person that I am and how I don’t always put you first. I’m sorry that I don’t always listen to your loving advice and wisdom because of my selfish nature. I do promise that I will try harder each day to be the wife you need me to be and to work at becoming more selfless instead of selfish.  I hope one day, through God’s infinite grace, to embody that of a Proverbs 31 wife. For now, know that I see you and that I love you, even when my actions don’t always reflect it. I truly love being your wife, and I would hope you’d be proud to call me yours too. I know I can be difficult and stubborn all at once, but I am thankful for your daily grace, patience, and love with me.  Marriage teaches you a lot about the kind of person that you are, and right now I am a pretty selfish one. Marriage is about sacrifice, and grace, and love, and a whole lot of forgiveness. Hubby, thank you for showing me what it means to be selfless. For allowing me to simply be me, even when I am less than pleasant. Thank you for continually showing me Jesus, and how much He loves me through all my flaws. Thank you for being kind when I am not, and for forgiving me over and over again–especially when I get mad when technology doesn’t work 😉 . I want to be a wife to you that is trustworthy, loving, patient, kind, and selfless. Lord knows I am none of those things some days, and am thankful for God’s grace and yours when that happens. I realize that I am flawed and cannot love you the way that God does, but through Him I will continue to strive to do that even when I miserably fail.  Thank you for always pushing me to be better, to do better, than the day before. Thank you for trying to understand when my emotions go all kinds of roller coaster crazy and I am moody. Thank you for supporting me in all my goals and dreams–especially this blog! This blog wouldn’t even exist without you because you made it happen because you are so smart and so insanely talented. Having the talent and technical know how of technology is something I could never dream of doing, but one which you do flawlessly.  When God gave me you as my husband, I know I couldn’t have picked someone as amazing as you are. He knew the type of man I needed, and He brought me you! I am so proud and so thankful to call you my husband. Marriage is a beautiful thing, but it is also quite messy. It is not for the faint of heart, but I believe that it is very much worth it. It is not always glamorous or happy, in fact–most days it is hard. But, it paints a beautiful picture of Christ’s relationship with the church. God loves all of us so so much, and yet we constantly do things that hurt Him. We push him away, rebel against Him, are selfish in our own ways and our own instructions. We think we know best, and yet, every single time, God is still there with open arms ready to embrace us no matter how many times we mess up or rebel against Him, or push Him away. He is always ready to welcome us home. God never goes anywhere. He is always there. We are the ones that move. In the same way, marriage is similar. When both people in the marriage are followers of Jesus, and have a relationship with Him, marriage unveils the beauty of the gospel. Even when we fall short, even when we don’t respect our spouses or love them the way we should, our spouse is there ready and waiting for us. Forgiving us when we fall short. Encouraging us when we are down. Leading us closer to Jesus so that He can change our hearts. Marriage is messy and beautiful because our relationships with God are too. God has us in our marriage relationships for a reason. I always heard that marriage isn’t to make you happy, but to make you holy. I never fully realized what that meant till I married you, B. I am thankful to be walking this road of refinement with you, and I honestly wouldn’t want it any other way. I want the messy, the hard, the ugly. Because I know that in the process of refinement, God is making something beautiful out of the ugly corners and crevices of my heart–of our hearts. Thank you for aiding in the refining process with me, B. I pray that God continues to chip away at my heart and that I can learn to love you just like He does. I strive to love you better everyday.    Love, Me. 
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